Don't Pretend to Understand Your Divorce Lawyer. It Could Cost You Thousands

I think almost everyone has done this at some point in their life.

You're sitting in a meeting. Someone is explaining something that you don't fully understand. You don't want to interrupt. You don't want to look stupid. So you smile, nod your head, and tell yourself you'll figure it out later.

The problem is, "later" can get really expensive when you're getting divorced.

We talked about this on the podcast because it's something Morgan sees all the time. A client comes into her office, they spend an hour talking through strategy, everyone leaves feeling like they're on the same page... and then the client gets into the car.

That's when the wheels start turning.

"Wait... do I actually agree with that?"

"That feels way more aggressive than I wanted."

"I honestly have no idea what we just decided."

If you've ever had that feeling, I promise you you're not alone.

One of the biggest misconceptions people have is that they should somehow understand everything their divorce attorney says. You shouldn't. This is your life, but it's your attorney's profession. They're dealing with legal strategy, procedures, deadlines, and terminology every single day. You're not.

There's nothing embarrassing about asking questions. In fact, I'd argue it's one of the smartest things you can do.

What ends up costing people money isn't asking too many questions. It's staying quiet.

Let's say you leave your attorney's office and say, "Okay, let's do it."

Your attorney goes back to work. They start drafting documents, planning strategy, communicating with opposing counsel, and moving your case forward.

Then two days later you realize... I don't actually want to do that.

Now you've changed direction after work has already been done.

That costs time. And time costs money.

Sometimes all of that could have been avoided if you had simply said, "Can you help me understand why this is the best approach?" or "I'm not sure I'm comfortable with that strategy yet."

One thing Morgan said during the episode really stood out to me.

She reminds her clients that they're still driving the bus.

Your attorney is there to advise you. They should absolutely tell you what they believe is the best legal strategy. But at the end of the day, these are your decisions.

If something doesn't sit right with you, say it. If you need another explanation, ask for one. If you need a day or two to think before moving forward, that's okay too.

One question I love that Morgan recommends asking is:

"If we do this, what do you think the other side is going to do next?"

Divorce is a lot like chess. Every move usually gets a response. Understanding what your attorney expects to happen next can make a strategy feel a whole lot less intimidating.

Another great tip? If you tend to leave meetings feeling overwhelmed, ask your attorney if they can send you a recap afterward.

Yes, you'll probably pay a little for that time.

But I'd much rather pay for a recap than pay to undo a misunderstanding later.

Divorce is emotional. It's overwhelming. There are going to be days when your brain simply can't absorb another piece of information.

That's normal.

What's important is giving yourself permission to slow the conversation down.

Ask another question.

Speak up if something doesn't feel right.

Tell your attorney if you need time to think.

Because pretending to understand doesn't make the process easier.

It usually just makes it more expensive.

And if you're looking for more ways to avoid the kinds of mistakes that quietly cost people thousands during divorce, that's exactly why we created the Divorce Crash Course.

For just $50 (normally $150 thanks to our angel underwriters, Our Family Wizard and Soberlink), you'll learn what to expect, where people overspend, and how to make smarter decisions throughout the process.

Because divorce is expensive enough.

You shouldn't have to pay extra just because you were afraid to ask one more question.